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Reality Check
When your employer is 'terrified' of you, you might want to review your leadership skills
by Mary Ford, Vice President of Marketing, Cbeyond
June 1, 2008
O
ften when people are referred to as leaders, the reference implies that they have reached
a destination. I believe that leadership isn't something achieved because you've reached a certain
title or salary. Rather, leadership is a choice and a constant journey. It's a path that begins
when you decide to accept "the call" of leadership and then develops based on your own
self-awareness and process of continuous improvement.
Deciding that you are on the
leadership path usually happens in one of two ways. Either you know it is what you want to do, or –
as was the case for me – others help you realize that it is something you want. It took me a long
time – and a lot of help from others – to realize that I should put myself on the leadership
path.
I had plenty of role models growing up. My mother owned and operated two small businesses
out of her home for nearly 30 years. My father was a partner in a law firm. I have two aunts who
have successful careers – one a physician and the other a hospital administrator. In my first job
at a software consulting firm, my manager was a strong, well-respected woman. But they all seemed
to be natural-born leaders who embodied leadership qualities from day one. I, on the other hand,
seemed unfit, unable to measure up to what I thought was a leader.
As my career progressed, I found myself given more responsibilities – literally, being
pushed into leadership roles. Mentors pushed me to step up and go after leadership positions, and
supervisors offered me the opportunity to manage more people and projects. I finally got the hint
and decided to accept the call to leadership. I decided that I wanted to give it a try and become
not just a leader, but a good leader.
Sometimes you actually have to decide that you want to be a leader. You may not have been
born with a gut instinct that you were meant to be a leader and you may not have had someone
pushing you to lead – but that doesn't mean that you won't be good at it! However it happens for
you, it is important to make a conscious commitment to
leadership.
Once you accept this role, leadership is an ongoing iterative process, and every great
leader I know is working to refine his or her style and approach. Opportunities to improve
leadership styles arise in all careers, and great leaders embrace these opportunities to
continually improve themselves and their respective organizations. Oftentimes these instances are
marked by events, both positive and negative, that cause you to learn something about yourself and
your leadership style.
I clearly remember an experience that led me to learn a great deal about myself. An employee
had shared with others that she was terrified of me. This came as a complete shock to me, and I
realized I needed to adjust my leadership style to better serve my team. I also learned how
important it was to understand how others perceived me. Once
you are on a path to leadership, self-awareness and openness to feedback are essential. A leader
must welcome constructive criticism as a means to improve personally and professionally and to
better identify ways in which a team and organization can best
succeed.
Great leaders are not perfect, and I firmly believe there is no final state of leadership
that you can achieve. People who are considered great leaders do not have everything figured out.
Great leaders have learned that leadership is a continuous journey that calls for you to be aware
of your own capabilities and to revisit your leadership style as you proceed in your life and
career. If you treat leadership as a journey, you will make the most of each step and reach the
goals you strive to accomplish.
